Being a mother was something I always wanted to be. Years ago, in a basement playroom, my best friend and I would ask each other what we wanted to be when we grew up. I would answer:
1. A mother
2. A teacher
3. An actress
I didn’t know then that numbers 2 and 3 would be a part of number 1. Those of you that are mothers will understand number 3. Sometimes we have to act our little hearts out; like to not show shock at something that comes out of their mouths or to not crumple with laughter when they are doing something they shouldn’t, but is hilarious none the less.
My life has been filled with a vast array of examples of motherhood. From my immediate family to friends and acquaintances. Those of you that know my own mother know that I won the lottery to have been born to her. She is amazing in every way.
The thing about this ride called motherhood is that you are in no way prepared for it before it happens, no matter your examples, or veracious consumption of parenting books while you are expecting. It completely and unexpectedly flips your life upside down and right side up the minute they hand you your child in the delivery room. It continues to twist your life into something new the minute you arrive in your own home, without nurses or knowledgable elders, holding this new life in your own callow arms.
As many have witnessed through the “mommy wars”; there is no one right way to mother. There are many acceptable and successful ways to raise and nurture a young life. Navigating those unfamiliar waters is most definitely rocky and at times you are fearful your choices have left scars that only time will tell the damage. It is important to remember as a mother you know your child and family best and to follow your instincts when making the tough decisions you face. You know the right thing to do, always. Somehow you just know. And even if you mess up; you know how to apologize. Parenting teaches you that leading by example is a must.
As mothers we are all things to our children, teacher, caregiver, judge, jury and confidant. We raise them to have upstanding character, a solid moral compass, and a well-rounded education. In addition, we hope to give them the tenacity, perseverance and determination to become all they hope to be. We also take great care to let them pursue their own dreams. With my own children, I do this without the expectation that I continue to be a part of their lives. It is my hope that I earn a place in my grown children’s lives, but it is not something that I am in any way entitled to.
Raising children can be a lonely place as well, but it brings the most exquisite joy that can be found in no other realm of life. As you know, I have four children – hence the name of my blog afourytale. And in my short tenure as a mother, each of my children have humbled me. Each of my children have taught me new things. And each have given me a unique perspective on life. If I had it to choose all over again what I wanted to be when I grow up, I would choose those three choices all over again. While motherhood is something that can bring us to our knees, and test our patience, it also gives back in aces.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms, the ones with babies here and in heaven, the moms who have yet to hold their own precious loved ones, the moms that do it all on their own, and each and every special and divine mother.
May today find you without laundry to do and a never-ending supply of help to get all the chores done. May you be spoiled rotten today; you most certainly deserve it.
Sincerely,
